Red Fred - "At one time or another all booties will go through Walmart"




By Cletus Maricle

Anybody will tell you that 2014 was the year of the booty with Jennifer Lopez, Kim Kardashian, Rihanna, and Beyoncé all making a statement. Disney and Miley Cyrus tried to capitalize on the public’s fascination with the booty. Jennifer Lawrence received unwanted assistance from the person who released photos of her in the buff.

Red Fred is aware of all of this.

He has been down to Walmart checking out business opportunities created by 2014, the year of the booty.

He explained that there was no better place to start than Walmart because more booties darken Walmart’s doors on a single day than any other set of doors.

Further, at one time or another all booties will go through Walmart. He says - "They range in size from “almost none at all” to “way yonder too much”, from “very narrow” to “quite expansive”, from a “little too high” to dropping “just below the knees”. Some are well covered. Others show practically all."

Red Fred has decided that Walmart would be an excellent location for a Booty Shop to do implants and transplants.

For the supercenters it could be ideally located between the beauty shop and the eye doctor. There would be no shortage of donors or recipients.

I explained to Red Fred that in light of the part of the body involved such business might be considered pimping and that I was sure that some federal prosecutor somewhere would try to prosecute those involved for violation of the Mann Act.

He is unwilling to listen to me and has headed for Bentonville, Arkansas to present his plan to Walmart.


Red Fred is traveling interstate to market his idea which will surely affect interstate commerce.



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